The absurdity of existence

The college campus of Harvard has been buzzing this September because of Mitchell Heisman.

Heisman was a man who worked at various bookstores in the Harvard area, he was in his mid-thirties and he was writing a book.  On September 18th, Heisman walked out onto the steps of Harvard Memorial Church and shot himself.  He left behind a suicide note, a thought-provoking 1,905 pages long note published online at the domain name of http://www.suicidenote.info.  This was the book he had been working on; this was his pièce de rèsistance and this was what left his family, the students, professors, media and public guessing.

Although I haven't fully engaged with all of the material in the note, a cursory reading reveals how well-researched and well-read Heisman was.  His note is really a book that makes a statement about contemporary society through the philosophical perspectives of nihilism and through the Christian faith.  Simply put, it's jaw-dropping stuff and a fascinating insight into an incredibly intellectually-gifted mind.

The reason I bestow the compliment (and perhaps also the curse) of intellectual-giftedness on Heisman is because reading his note reveals that he was obsessed with life and the questions surrounding it. Questions are important... hell, they're vital. Without questions and questioning, the heuristic possibilities of everything and anything are slim.  He never stopped questioning life and existence and, ironically, much like his inspiration Nietzsche; he suffered a mental breakdown.

Ultimately though, Heisman's own suicide is put forward by him to be an act of 'experimental elimination of self-preservation.'  The ambiguity of this is remarkable given the context it is presented in.  From my own sparse reading of his note (which I will read with the attention and focus it deserves very soon) I think Heisman simply realised there is no answer to life - a realisation the intellectual, scientifically-trained mind refuses to accept.  This refusal to accept the seemingly inevitable is what seemingly tormented him to the extent that he could only save himself through elimination.  There is the archaic belief that still persists today in non-Western cultures that the smarter man is the more tormented man and that with greater knowledge comes greater burden.  This seems to be very true for the philosophically-versed Heisman.

Really, Heisman's suicide note and his suicide have a lot to gift psychologists with but at the same time they are excellent examples for the philosophical school of absurdism to peruse - after all, the tragic ending to Heisman's academic endeavours is a testament of the absurdity of existence: you exist but you do not understand why, trying to understand will be an effort, never an accomplishment. I personally do not think human knowledge has limits.  Instead, I know that knowledge takes place in transitory processes and in due time.  The questions Heisman wanted answers to were unfortunately not ones that were solved in his time.  The logic in me tells me this.  However, I know that the philosophical community much prefer the viewpoint I mentioned earlier: after all, the tragic ending to Heisman's academic endeavours is a testament of the absurdity of existence: you exist but you do not understand why, trying to understand will be an effort, never an accomplishment.

Take what you want from this.  In fact, have a read through of Heisman's note, pass it on around your blogs and let me know what you make of it.